


it seems to be love

by Ascent_96



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-12
Updated: 2019-11-12
Packaged: 2021-01-29 09:43:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21408142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ascent_96/pseuds/Ascent_96
Summary: wooseok isn't used to the feelings seungyoun makes him feel.
Relationships: Cho Seungyeon | Seungyoun/Kim Wooseok | Wooshin
Comments: 3
Kudos: 89





	it seems to be love

**Author's Note:**

> just a story that i mindlessly started and ended because i needed a distraction from all the issues and because i missed seungseok ㅠㅠ

kim wooseok is a person who lives in a world of flighty relationships.

cho seungyoun knows this when he first meets kim wooseok.

_do you want to sleep with me?_ its a meeting in a dingy dim alley lined by cheap gay bars at the side. its far from seungyoun's ideal fantasy of a romantic falling-in-love-at-first-sight situation.

but he is feeling empty and needs someone to fill in the void. after going through day after day where his music is rejected harshly by one company after another, where his efforts are depreciated and degraded, he falls into the deepest slump he has ever been in his life.

if life is already this shitty then why not just continue living in a shitty way like this? the thought lingers in his mind as his lips entangle with the other in a heated rush, barely minding anymore at the fact that he is going to have sex with a stranger he barely even knows. its not his usual style but the stranger is a rare beauty and he is in desperate need of instant gratification, so the fingers that claw the shirt open are impatient the second their body touch the bed.

_ha- _a breathless moan emits from the lips that are released from the messy kiss briefly. seungyoun's mouth trails away from the lips to ravish on the neck that looks pale and flawless.

everything about this person is too perfect and seungyoun wants to ruin it. destroy it. the sadistic desire whispers loud in seungyoun's head as it seeks for relief in a twisted way. it only seems satisfying to reciprocate in the same way as how life and people have been treating him.

_hurts...!_ there is a pained sound, but seungyoun barely registers it instead digs his teeth even further to sink into the flesh, marking like a wild beast that wants to claim everything.

a fist hits him on the back a few times before hands try to push away his shoulders with all their strength. when seungyoun finally detaches himself, the imprinted marks leave traces of blood that taint the previously flawless perfect neck.

_crazy bastard..._ a pair of eyes glares at him from below as if he has lost his mind. the pretty eyes, eventhough filled with irritation then, looks pretty as they brimmed with tears. the huge orbs blur and glimmer in the darkness.

seungyoun's hands linger along the small slender body, feeling the difference in size of the limbs, waist and legs. everything looks so small and fragile as if it would break. he clasps his hand with wooseok's tightly as he probes his already erected member at the entrance below. wooseok doesnt seem to like unnecessary touches and tries to slither his fingers away the whole time seungyoun moves inside him but seungyoun catches him back everytime and plunges even deeper until wooseok loses his mind temporarily, immediately forgetting about the bothersome warmth in his hand as he cries at the unbearable pain that pierces him relentlessly from below.

_ah, ah... its going to tear-_ the crying face below is a mess. with hair that splays all over the pillow, cheeks that are wet all over from tears, body that keeps writhing as it struggles to adjust to the throbbing heat inside him which seems to grow bigger and bigger each minute.

the pretty person seems to be suffering. body submitted completely by the pain, the hazy eyes can only look up at him while drop after drop of tears fall with every slow blink. seungyoun watches distractedly as the trail of tears ended into a small damp patch at the pillow underneath. 

as if his whole anger and bitterness were tamed by the sight, seungyoun's demeanour becomes calm again. with features that are softened, he leans down and caresses his lips on one side of the wet cheek gently, collecting the remnants of moisture on his tongue while he licks all the way up to the half lidded eyes that watch him silently.

_don't cry, i'll be gentler..._ soothing whisper falls into the other's ear in an effort to provide even the littlest means of comfort, as if trying to apologize.

seungyoun starts moving again, and this time its slower gentler and patient as he explores every inch of wooseok's body and insides in an almost loving manner.

kim wooseok doesn't believe in love, doesn't have sex with the same person twice. so when they exchange contacts after theyre done, he has to wonder the implication behind agreeing to it.

because he likes cho seungyoun? yes, he thinks, in a sexual way. there is something about the way cho seungyoun holds someone that wooseok never felt with anyone before.

they meet for sex for a second time then third then fourth and the number of times goes on until wooseok loses count. the body that has gradually became used to cho seungyoun is as if unable to receive another person anymore.

_...are you not going to let go?_ wooseok asks when seungyoun remains with his arms wrapped around wooseok and his front pressed to wooseok's back. wooseok wants to get dressed and leave the moment he's done but seungyoun seems to have a different idea in mind.

seungyoun lets go of one hand, but only briefly to open music on his phone before settling back around the small waist. soft dreamy song floats in the air amidst the rainy background. he feels the smile on seungyoun's lips against his back as the other hums languidly to the song that storytells about love.

seungyoun is this kind of devotedly romantic person. who often looks at wooseok with warmth and kindness in his eyes, embraces him tenderly to sleep in the aftermath of sex, sends him sweet messages everyday and constantly putting in effort to arrange a date to meet.

kim wooseok doesn't really know what love is or how love feels like. but if love is this warm happy feeling that tickles his heart, if love is this anticipation that blooms in his chest as the day of their meeting comes nearer each time, then wooseok wants to know more about love.

but he is also immensely afraid.

wooseok learned after sleeping with his first man, that relationship never last. they met, had sex and parted without a word. people came and go in his life like a passing blur. he barely felt anything anymore after his third man. as if his heart has been numbed by coldness, he lived sleeping with random people to fill in the void in his heart.

then he met seungyoun. a man who seemed to have the gloomiest expression he has ever seen as the man leaned on a grimy wall with a cigarette wedged between his lips. a few cigarette butts littered around his feet and it continued to collect in amount as time passed. as if wanting to smoke himself to death, wooseok watched as the mouth endlessly inhaled the nicotine from the cancer stick without a care in the world. when their eyes met there was only a cold, broken emptiness that was reflected from those dead eyes.

wooseok, out of anyone, understood those emotions very well and took the initiative to approach, stretching out his hand to the lonely man who was as if just waiting for someone in his corner. 

and since their meeting on that day, those dead eyes slowly regained its life back.

its the first time wooseok experienced this feeling as seungyoun chases after him as if he is the only one he needed.

wooseok begins to question and doubt. because he can't really understand. and also because he is afraid.

when he tries to find another guy to sleep with in the midst of his confusion, seungyoun's message appears on his phone. _where are you?_ when he replies saying that he is in a bar, he doesnt receive anymore messages from seungyoun after that.

a guy sees him from afar, took interest in him, touches his hand and asks if he wants to follow him somewhere. the hidden message that underlies the suggestion is familiar, but the rough hand on top of his is unfamiliar and wooseok realizes the strange feelings that arise within him in that moment.

the feeling of not wanting to disappoint seungyoun. the feeling of wanting to be loyal to seungyoun. the feeling of repulsion towards any other man except seungyoun who touches him like this.

since his meeting with seungyoun on that day, the feelings that has been dead for a long time within him start to awaken again.

before he can answer the man who is still waiting for him expectantly, his wrist is snatched away from the man's hold by another hand.

when he turned his head to look, seungyeon stands with an angry expression. breathless as if he has been running the whole way here, wooseok notes the face that struggles to speak amidst all the distress. the palm that holds him is cold and clammy with sweat.

_follow me._

its an order as the words are spitted out, cutting sharp like the edge of a steel. wooseok doesn't even have a chance to say anything back in return but to let himself get dragged all the way out with his wrist held in an almost crushing grip.

seungyoun pulls him into an isolated alley before releasing him. wooseok rubs his reddened wrist and gazes at seungyoun solemnly. the hurt is written all over the other's face. _if i had come a little later, you would've already followed him and slept with him by now-_ there is exasperation, frustration and fear in the trembling voice that spews out accusation.

wooseok replies with a conflicted look, every bit of his expression asking why. that unvoiced why are you behaving like this, why are you so upset with me reaches seungyoun and seungyoun sighs, taking a step forward and rests his forehead weakly on wooseok's shoulder ..._dont you understand my feelings?_

the breathing is warm against his skin, a reminiscence of the familiar body heat that envelops him with tenderness on nights where he often questioned the feelings of cho seungyoun. since when it starts to feel anything more than mere sex, the boundaries of those feelings seem to have blurred in the midst of all the confusion. since when a meeting where its supposed to be just another farewell turn into something this confusing, complicated by intricate feelings that he could not give words to.

the head that leans on him slowly lifts up to meet his eyes. there is a soft kind of sadness in those imploring gaze. _do you really not understand my feelings?_

wooseok feels his breathing space gradually becomes narrowed in the heavy feelings that weigh between them. seungyoun's face grew closer to his and their lips touch. the kiss is nothing like those usual kisses fueled by desperation and desire, instead it is a kiss that is almost scared, yet soft, innocent and full of something else that he can't describe. the softness as seungyoun slowly moves his lips against his causes wooseok to tremble as if it is his first kiss. his breath rushes out like his feelings that erupts suddenly.

seungyoun finds his hands and intertwined their fingers together. wooseok doesn't like unnecessary touches, but right now seungyoun's touches seem to finally make sense as their intertwined hands connect with their intertwined feelings.

it seems to be love.


End file.
